Blue Cross irks me…

So. Back in EARLY APRIL, I had already shelled out $5,008 in ‘deductible’. The astute among you may note that this is actually a number greater than $4,800, which would be what my family deductible is supposed to be.

Well, all was groovy…for, like, four Explanations of Benefits.

Paid this, you owe that
Paid this, you owe that
Paid this, you owe nothing (we have now paid more than $5,500, which is our stop-loss period)
Paid this, you owe nothing

Then….
Paid nothing, you pay $980 and we apply it to your deductible
Paid nothing, you pay $49 and we apply it to your deductible
Paid nothing, you pay $624 and we apply it to your deductible

Excuse me, but, WHAAAAAAAAAAAT?!?!

So I call them in order to scream WHAAAAAAAAAAAT?!?! into the phone, and do you know what she says to me?

She says, “Gee, there’s a lot of EOBs for this family and it’s really difficult for me to add them all up myself. I’m going to forward this to our other department, because this is what they do and they can do it really fast…

{wait for it}

{waaaaaait for iiiiiiiit}

Can you call back in two weeks?”

OK, now hang on a second. In the meantime, I’m being inundated with !URGENT! and !PAY NOW! bills from all these doctors and labs and so forth. Telling them I need to wait two weeks to find out if I have a dispute with y’all…really doesn’t cut it.

Also, let’s not look at the whole family. Let’s look just at me. I, alone, by myself, have shelled out $5,371 to date. (Total bills if we include the ones in my drawer waiting to be paid: $5,809.)

Check my math. Is not $5,371 > $4,800? Have I not, ergo, in any case, regardless of what my family is doing, managed all by my lonesome to meet the deductible requirements – that anything they might add, in point of fact, will only tip the scales further in the direction of Already Met Our Deductible Land? In which case…

What.
The.
Hell?

First, I need a drink.

Then, I need to kill something (something virtual, not something real, I’m not that crazy-upset)

Toss in the fact that what has been charged for medical services so far this year is $33,336.40, and I need two drinks and an extended session of virtual murder.

**sigh**

I’m awfully glad I’m feeling better. Because I need every ounce of strength I possess to deal with Blue Cross…